Bucket List Destinations

[00:00:05] Malorie Mackey: Hello, hello. Hello, everyone. Welcome back to Weird World Adventures, the podcast. I'm your host, Mallory. [00:00:12] Michael Maldonado: I'm your host, Michael. [00:00:13] Malorie Mackey: And we're here to show you just how weird this world of ours really is. So today we're gonna set up for. I'm gonna go ahead and just put this out there now. [00:00:23] Michael Maldonado: Okay. [00:00:24] Malorie Mackey: Season two of Weird World Adventures will be releasing on Amazon prime in the fall. So we're gonna dedicate the next series of episodes to highlight an episode from the season until we cover all 10. I'm gonna keep talking dramatically. [00:00:41] Michael Maldonado: What is happening? [00:00:42] Malorie Mackey: It's been a long day and we're having fun. You're the one laughing over here. So we're gonna highlight each of the episodes leading up to the release in the fall. [00:00:51] Michael Maldonado: To 10 episodes leading up to the release. [00:00:55] Malorie Mackey: Yep. [00:00:55] Michael Maldonado: Okay. [00:00:56] Malorie Mackey: It's gonna be an adventure. [00:00:57] Michael Maldonado: An adventure. [00:00:58] Malorie Mackey: And we can kind of talk about, like, the behind the scenes of filming each of the episodes and what people can expect. The BTs, the fun stories they might not know about two guys admiring penises in Iceland. [00:01:08] Michael Maldonado: The debauchery. [00:01:09] Malorie Mackey: The debauchery. So it's gonna be fun. But first, before we do that, I think it'd be fun to just have a practical, fun travel podcast. Or really you did. Cause it was your idea. [00:01:20] Michael Maldonado: Yeah. Credit where it's due. [00:01:21] Malorie Mackey: I gave the credit. I just took credit first and then redirected it back to you. So we're gonna talk about three places we each would like to go see and why that we haven't been to yet. [00:01:34] Michael Maldonado: Bucket list. [00:01:35] Malorie Mackey: Bucket list. [00:01:36] Michael Maldonado: 3 bucket list places and why. [00:01:39] Malorie Mackey: And I only have one in my mind right now. [00:01:42] Michael Maldonado: Oh, really? [00:01:42] Malorie Mackey: We'll see how this goes. Yes. Okay. [00:01:44] Michael Maldonado: I've got three. [00:01:45] Malorie Mackey: You start. [00:01:47] Michael Maldonado: All right. [00:01:48] Malorie Mackey: Just one. [00:01:49] Michael Maldonado: They don't have to be in order. [00:01:50] Malorie Mackey: Nah, I just start with one. We'll go back and forth. [00:01:52] Michael Maldonado: No, I know, but no particular order. Three are not in any particular order. [00:01:56] Malorie Mackey: No particular order. [00:01:57] Michael Maldonado: All right. Australia. [00:01:59] Malorie Mackey: Really? [00:02:00] Michael Maldonado: Yeah. [00:02:00] Malorie Mackey: Why? [00:02:01] Michael Maldonado: It's far away and just different from where I've been. It's like almost as far as you can go from where we are before you start coming back. It's just very different. [00:02:14] Malorie Mackey: And they have like dog sized spiders. [00:02:17] Michael Maldonado: Yeah, that's what I mean. They have crazy stuff in Australia. [00:02:21] Malorie Mackey: What would your ideal Australian vacation consist of? [00:02:27] Michael Maldonado: Part of the reason I want to go is I just don't know a whole lot about Australia. [00:02:30] Malorie Mackey: Okay. [00:02:31] Michael Maldonado: But if I had to just. I guess also in preface this. You have as much time as you want. No time constraint on It, I mean, I would want to start probably in Sydney. It's like the only place I know. [00:02:44] Malorie Mackey: I was gonna say, do you have. [00:02:45] Michael Maldonado: A city of mine in Australia? But I would like to just see a lot of the outback type. [00:02:51] Malorie Mackey: So like full adventure. [00:02:53] Michael Maldonado: Adventure safari. [00:02:55] Malorie Mackey: The dingoes. [00:02:56] Michael Maldonado: The dingoes ate your baby. Not my baby. Yeah, I just like to explore the whole area. Adventure. Adventure, vacation. [00:03:05] Malorie Mackey: Can you name any other cities in. No, absolutely. I can. I can name two more. [00:03:09] Michael Maldonado: Oh, maybe I can. Well, there's the. I mean the famous Barrier Reef is right off Australia. [00:03:16] Malorie Mackey: The Great Barrier Reef. [00:03:17] Michael Maldonado: Yeah. I don't know if there's a city attached to it. [00:03:19] Malorie Mackey: I think it's near Sydney. [00:03:20] Michael Maldonado: Okay, then. No. [00:03:23] Malorie Mackey: You've never heard of Melbourne? [00:03:24] Michael Maldonado: Oh, I've heard of Melbourne. Okay. [00:03:26] Malorie Mackey: Queensland. [00:03:27] Michael Maldonado: I've heard of Queensland. [00:03:28] Malorie Mackey: Okay. Yeah, there's some places. [00:03:30] Michael Maldonado: Okay, so those, I'd see those and. [00:03:32] Malorie Mackey: You go snorkel or dive. [00:03:33] Michael Maldonado: I do the whole thing. [00:03:34] Malorie Mackey: Yeah. [00:03:34] Michael Maldonado: I wanted you. I'm not, I'm not certified yet, but I would get certified before I made a big vacation to Australia. [00:03:40] Malorie Mackey: Right. [00:03:41] Michael Maldonado: But yeah, diving Great Barrier Reef. See the main cities. Do adventure outback trip. See the crazy stuff. [00:03:49] Malorie Mackey: Rent a Jeep. [00:03:50] Michael Maldonado: Rent a jeep. [00:03:51] Malorie Mackey: Okay. [00:03:52] Michael Maldonado: All the crazy, very deadly stuff out there. [00:03:55] Malorie Mackey: Giant spiders. [00:03:56] Michael Maldonado: I definitely see the giant spiders. [00:03:58] Malorie Mackey: Muscle kangaroos. Yeah, yeah. [00:04:01] Michael Maldonado: Just jacked. [00:04:02] Malorie Mackey: Yeah, yeah, yeah. [00:04:04] Michael Maldonado: It's just weird and different. I've been, you know, I mean, obviously I've seen a bunch of the U.S. i've seen some, but not as much as I'd like to of Europe. I've seen a fair amount of Asia just because of growing up military and living in Okinawi. Bounced a bit around there. I haven't seen really any South America, any Africa. So. Yeah. [00:04:32] Malorie Mackey: Okay. [00:04:32] Michael Maldonado: Australia just seems different. It seems the most foreign from any of the places I've been. [00:04:37] Malorie Mackey: Would you want to hop over to New Zealand? [00:04:39] Michael Maldonado: Yeah, I thought about, I thought about making it New Zealand instead of Australia, but I didn't. [00:04:44] Malorie Mackey: Lord of the Rings. [00:04:44] Michael Maldonado: I know I could do that. [00:04:45] Malorie Mackey: You could follow the Lord of the Rings trail. [00:04:47] Michael Maldonado: That's true. And I do have a, a work friend who spent six months or so in New Zealand like in between jobs. Did like part time work between two jobs in New Zealand and loved it. [00:05:02] Malorie Mackey: It's very nature y and green. [00:05:04] Michael Maldonado: He said if he, he brought his whole family over there for at least a chunk of that time and said if he didn't have a family he wouldn't have left. Like he would just stay in New Zealand and Kept working there. Yeah. [00:05:18] Malorie Mackey: Interesting. You know, I've gone diving in the second largest reef in the world. Do you know where that is? [00:05:24] Michael Maldonado: Well, I'm trying to think where you would have gone diving. [00:05:28] Malorie Mackey: It's where I got certified or. It's not where I got certified. It's where I first did my first dive, my discover scuba. [00:05:35] Michael Maldonado: I don't know. Where is it? [00:05:37] Malorie Mackey: Honduras? Roatan. [00:05:38] Michael Maldonado: Oh, I would never have known that. [00:05:40] Malorie Mackey: Roton is like divers paradise. They have a bunch of shipwrecks and, like, I think there's like hundreds of dive spots. [00:05:47] Michael Maldonado: Really? [00:05:47] Malorie Mackey: Mm. [00:05:48] Michael Maldonado: That's cool. [00:05:49] Malorie Mackey: That's cool. It misled me into believing that diving was really an awesome experience all the time. [00:05:56] Michael Maldonado: Yeah. [00:05:56] Malorie Mackey: It's only sometimes an awesome experience. [00:05:58] Michael Maldonado: Yeah. [00:05:59] Malorie Mackey: Yeah, that's. [00:06:00] Michael Maldonado: That's just true. [00:06:01] Malorie Mackey: I know if I had gotten certified, if I had not gone diving prior to getting certified, I probably never would have dove again. [00:06:13] Michael Maldonado: Well, not going prior to getting certified sounds awful. You just, you know, don't know where you're. [00:06:18] Malorie Mackey: Someone does it for you. You go with like a dive master one on one, and they, like, lower you. You learn the basics. [00:06:26] Michael Maldonado: Okay. [00:06:26] Malorie Mackey: Like how to get water out of your mask and what, like, what to do and not to do, like, the really important stuff, and then they deflate. [00:06:34] Michael Maldonado: They do all your stuff. [00:06:35] Malorie Mackey: Yeah, they do all your stuff for you. [00:06:36] Michael Maldonado: Okay, well, that doesn't sound as bad, though. [00:06:37] Malorie Mackey: Yeah. And you're like, with them the whole time, so it's like, very hands on. But. Yeah. Don't ever dive in Los Angeles. It's terrible. [00:06:46] Michael Maldonado: Yeah. I don't need to spend a lot of time in Los Angeles, to be honest. [00:06:49] Malorie Mackey: You slept through all of Los Angeles. [00:06:51] Michael Maldonado: I saw parts of it. That's not what mattered. [00:06:54] Malorie Mackey: Like the highway for five seconds. [00:06:57] Michael Maldonado: Yeah, exactly. [00:06:58] Malorie Mackey: Okay. [00:07:00] Michael Maldonado: It's not my scene, the big city. I don't know. I mean, I have no problem visiting New York and LA and those kind of places, but I have no interest in living there. [00:07:10] Malorie Mackey: Yes, I agree with that. [00:07:11] Michael Maldonado: There's very few places in the world that I would choose, like, not would want to live less than that. I mean, that's not true. There's plenty of terrible places I wouldn't want to live. But in the US there's very few places in the US that I would have a lower likelihood of living than the giant cities like New York and la. For any experience, extended period of time. [00:07:35] Malorie Mackey: Yeah. [00:07:35] Michael Maldonado: I could do like a year or whatever. [00:07:37] Malorie Mackey: Yeah. [00:07:37] Michael Maldonado: Like, I looked at internships and stuff in some of those cities. [00:07:40] Malorie Mackey: Okay. [00:07:41] Michael Maldonado: To settle down no, not for me. [00:07:43] Malorie Mackey: Okay. My first and, like, my big bucket list place that I still want to go to is Papua New Guinea. [00:07:51] Michael Maldonado: That's a good one. [00:07:52] Malorie Mackey: Yeah. It's near Australia. [00:07:53] Michael Maldonado: I mean, you dropped enough money on that. Papua New guinea penis gourd. Penis gourd. [00:07:59] Malorie Mackey: So this is why I want to go to Papua New Guinea. Not the penis gourds. [00:08:03] Michael Maldonado: Well, that's why I want to go. [00:08:04] Malorie Mackey: It's because it's one of the most. It's one of the safest still tribal locations you can visit. It's still very tribal. They have villages, like you would think for a tribal village, and parts of it are so separated that they have a bastard version of English that they speak that is so bastardized, you have to have a translator to help you figure out what they're saying. [00:08:31] Michael Maldonado: Okay, interesting. [00:08:31] Malorie Mackey: Like, for instance, how old are you? How much Christmas you. Like, how many Christmases have you lived? But, like, so bastardized. [00:08:40] Michael Maldonado: Okay. [00:08:41] Malorie Mackey: To like. [00:08:41] Michael Maldonado: Yeah. [00:08:42] Malorie Mackey: So there. [00:08:42] Michael Maldonado: It's like, you wouldn't be able to understand it even as a fluent English speaker without. [00:08:48] Malorie Mackey: And it's not because of accents. It's because it's a completely bastardized version of English. That's not what we speak. [00:08:54] Michael Maldonado: So is it still considered English? At what point does it become its own language? I mean, all languages are. You know, the vast majority of languages develop from another language at some point. They're just a new language. [00:09:05] Malorie Mackey: I wonder if they call it something else. [00:09:07] Michael Maldonado: Yeah, no, I'm curious. [00:09:08] Malorie Mackey: I'm curious. It would be great if this would work. Okay. [00:09:13] Michael Maldonado: And Australia has a fair amount of the. The tribal stuff too, right? There's still a significant Aborigine population in Australia. That's pretty untouched, isn't it? [00:09:25] Malorie Mackey: I think so. But again, I don't know. Papua New guinea has the houses on sticks, the stilt houses. Or we had that whole. That trivia game that we played, and that was one of the answers, and I nailed it. I'm like, oh, I know this one. [00:09:39] Michael Maldonado: Stilt houses and penis gourds. [00:09:41] Malorie Mackey: Yeah. [00:09:41] Michael Maldonado: If the question's about that, you're gonna nail it. [00:09:43] Malorie Mackey: Right. And then there's also a bunch of, like, ruined planes and things from World War II that are just hanging out there. It's a very, like, weird, weird, weird place. They speak English and then there's a few different tribal languages, so they. I guess maybe one of the tribal languages is that bastardized English. [00:10:04] Michael Maldonado: Got it. [00:10:07] Malorie Mackey: Those languages talk pissing. That's how I would say talk pissing and hirimotu. [00:10:17] Michael Maldonado: I Like it. [00:10:18] Malorie Mackey: Yeah. It's also where the phrase, at least for me, poop on a stick comes from. Because they still have. They still believe in witchcraft and they will have, you know, like, people that do magic and protections. And I think they. I had to learn this when I was doing my anthropology class and I wish I retained more of it, but. They curse you with your poop. So be like, hide your poop. Because they put your poop on a stick, it curses you. [00:10:43] Michael Maldonado: Well, you'd be in trouble there. [00:10:45] Malorie Mackey: I know, I know. [00:10:49] Michael Maldonado: I don't know if that's your place if you're gonna get cursed with poop on a poop. [00:10:52] Malorie Mackey: I know. Gosh. Oh, gosh. Poop on a stick. [00:10:56] Michael Maldonado: I mean, I used to say that too, but I don't think it was in any reference to Pop. Not that I knew. [00:11:03] Malorie Mackey: At least I heard about the poop on a stick and was like, well, that's where that came from. I don't know. That might have been a logic leap for me. But anywhere else have you ever heard poop on a stick besides just an exasperated sting? [00:11:14] Michael Maldonado: In the all time comedy classic Random Acts of Stupidity, we did a whole scene where we chased. We chased kids around with poop on a stick. [00:11:25] Malorie Mackey: Oh, my gosh. That's right. [00:11:27] Michael Maldonado: You sure that scene was called Poop on a Stick? That's where I heard it from. [00:11:33] Malorie Mackey: Oh, my gosh. Okay, what's your next pick? [00:11:36] Michael Maldonado: Well, so. Cause that has no. [00:11:38] Malorie Mackey: Okay, all right, give the context. Give the context. [00:11:40] Michael Maldonado: That was a cobbled together movie my friends and I made. Imitating Jackass in high school. We called it Ran Max of Stupidity. That's the context. [00:11:49] Malorie Mackey: Yeah. And we watched. [00:11:50] Michael Maldonado: But we called one of the skits Poo on a Stick. [00:11:52] Malorie Mackey: That's really funny. Me and Marissa, maybe. [00:11:54] Michael Maldonado: Maybe one of my friends got it from Papua New Guinea. I have no idea. That's all I think when I hear that phrase, though, obviously it didn't come from us either. [00:12:02] Malorie Mackey: But I think of you guys using each other as bowling balls and crashing each other into lawn chairs. [00:12:09] Michael Maldonado: Yeah, that's just good old fun human lawn bowling. [00:12:14] Malorie Mackey: Right? I remember that. We watched and laughed at you. [00:12:22] Michael Maldonado: Well, we laughed at you for a lot of reasons. Two younger losers, my sister and her friend. [00:12:31] Malorie Mackey: You guys talked a lot of game about, when you go to middle school, we're gonna push you in the lockers and close you in. And we were all scared that you were gonna bully us. And then we actually saw you at school and you averted eye contact and dashed away as Fast as possible. [00:12:44] Michael Maldonado: You've brought this up a few times recently. I feel like you're almost insulted that we didn't follow through on our. [00:12:50] Malorie Mackey: You were so afraid to be, like, around us or acknowledge our existence in any way that, like, you averted eye contact and peaced out. [00:12:58] Michael Maldonado: Well, I don't know if afraid is the right word. We were concerned that your uncoolness would be contagious. Wow. [00:13:07] Malorie Mackey: We were also, like, the two tiniest kids in middle school. We were the smallest children at that school. [00:13:12] Michael Maldonado: You showed up. Let's see, I would have been. Me and my friends would have been eighth grade. [00:13:17] Malorie Mackey: Yeah. [00:13:18] Michael Maldonado: So at the top of the totem pole in middle school. Right. Right before you get reset to the bottom in high school. And you guys were, you know, the new sixth graders, but you looked like third grade. I mean, you were built like third grade, both of you. Yeah. You were tiny. [00:13:35] Malorie Mackey: So we were like the two smallest kids, I think in our class. [00:13:38] Michael Maldonado: There's already can be a pretty significant just development difference between an eighth grader and a sixth grader because you hit puberty in there at some point. So there's kids that are more adult. More adult sized, and there's kids that are. That's just a young child. [00:13:54] Malorie Mackey: Right. [00:13:55] Michael Maldonado: So it's already that. And then you guys show up as. Even amongst sixth graders would have been. Well, that's a young child. [00:14:02] Malorie Mackey: Yeah. We were freakishly small. [00:14:04] Michael Maldonado: Yeah. [00:14:05] Malorie Mackey: Yep. Yep. What's your second place? [00:14:10] Michael Maldonado: Rome. I mean, Italy in general, but specifically Rome. I am one of those guys that thinks about the Ancient Roman Empire on a regular basis. [00:14:21] Malorie Mackey: You brought that up a few times. It's just always on your mind. [00:14:23] Michael Maldonado: It's always on my mind. [00:14:25] Malorie Mackey: Mm. [00:14:26] Michael Maldonado: There's just nowhere. There's nothing cooler in history than the Ancient Roman Empire. And a lot of that stuff is still standing. [00:14:32] Malorie Mackey: Yeah. So you'll be excited by our. [00:14:35] Michael Maldonado: I mean, all of, like, western culture gets its roots from Greece and Rome. You know, ancient Greco Roman. Greco Roman. Yeah. [00:14:43] Malorie Mackey: Yeah. [00:14:44] Michael Maldonado: The U.S. constitution is largely based on Greek and Roman history teachings. [00:14:51] Malorie Mackey: Yeah, yeah. [00:14:52] Michael Maldonado: The Roman Republic. [00:14:53] Malorie Mackey: Right. So you'll be excited by our trip on the Orient Express. [00:14:57] Michael Maldonado: Oh, for sure. [00:14:58] Malorie Mackey: Oh, yeah. [00:14:59] Michael Maldonado: Oh, yeah. [00:14:59] Malorie Mackey: Through Italy. [00:15:00] Michael Maldonado: I mean, I wouldn't mind if I have unlimited time, you know, popping into Greece, but I'm trying to keep it to one place. So there's a lot of places in Italy I'd like to see, but Rome, because I just. I just like the Rome. The Rome stuff. Ancient Rome stuff. [00:15:14] Malorie Mackey: Mm. I mean, great. Greek mythology was my favorite subject in school. And when we. We did a semester of just Greek mythology and I think we also then moved into Roman mythology. I got a hundred. I was like so into it that I didn't ever miss a single question. Like, that was my. That was my thing. [00:15:35] Michael Maldonado: And you went on to do folklore. Great things. I guess that's true. You did use it. [00:15:41] Malorie Mackey: Yeah, I know. Okay. [00:15:42] Michael Maldonado: All right. [00:15:42] Malorie Mackey: Yeah. I found my calling when I was 11. [00:15:45] Michael Maldonado: We still haven't done an episode in Greece. [00:15:48] Malorie Mackey: I know. Now that's on the plan. I know it's on the docket. [00:15:52] Michael Maldonado: Whose idea was that? [00:15:53] Malorie Mackey: That was your idea. [00:15:54] Michael Maldonado: Credit where it's due. [00:15:56] Malorie Mackey: I'm heavily leaning to making one of my places Greece because of that. [00:16:00] Michael Maldonado: Yeah, well, that's gonna get checked off your bucket list sooner than later if you. [00:16:04] Malorie Mackey: It is. For years it was Romania and now we did that. [00:16:08] Michael Maldonado: We did it. [00:16:09] Malorie Mackey: And if I had to pick see somewhere in Europe, it's not to be in Europe. I know, I know. But I'm like trying to. I'm trying to. I have no interest in Australia. I would go to say that I went, but that's like not on my list. [00:16:23] Michael Maldonado: Well, your ass is getting dragged there anyways. [00:16:24] Malorie Mackey: I know. I'll enjoy it. Antarctica would be on my list, but I just hate boats so much that getting there. I don't know if it'd be worth it for you. [00:16:31] Michael Maldonado: Well, I'll spoil it for you. That's my next one. [00:16:38] Malorie Mackey: Canada. I have no. I've never been to Canada and I have no interest. [00:16:41] Michael Maldonado: I've been to Montreal and Vancouver. [00:16:43] Malorie Mackey: Okay. [00:16:45] Michael Maldonado: It just feels like you're in the U.S. if you ask me, it's close enough to United States culture that just feels. I went to Montreal for a bachelor party and we drove it, which was awful because we drove it. We were only there two days a weekend and we drove from Richmond in one go. It was a 19 hour drive back, but we just drove across the border. [00:17:13] Malorie Mackey: Yeah. [00:17:14] Michael Maldonado: And honestly, I wouldn't have known I was in a different country. Really. I mean, I did know what I, you know, there was. [00:17:21] Malorie Mackey: Until you get further up. [00:17:23] Michael Maldonado: Yeah. [00:17:23] Malorie Mackey: Yeah. [00:17:24] Michael Maldonado: Same with Vancouver. I went there for a conference and Yeah, I mean, obviously I flew there. [00:17:31] Malorie Mackey: Right. [00:17:32] Michael Maldonado: But other once I was there, I was like, this is just a nice. That's like the same English speaking as the US is. [00:17:41] Malorie Mackey: It's Hollywood number two. [00:17:42] Michael Maldonado: Built like the. Yeah. It looks. The architecture looks like a nice modern US city. And. [00:17:48] Malorie Mackey: Yeah. [00:17:50] Michael Maldonado: I don't know. Yeah, you would just not know. [00:17:53] Malorie Mackey: And then if I think about Going to South America. I just want to go back to Argentina. [00:17:57] Michael Maldonado: You spent a lot of time in South America. I spent zero time in South America. [00:18:01] Malorie Mackey: I would like to go. This is not my choice, but if I had to pick somewhere in South America, it would be Peru for the Peruvian Amazon. Actually, I'm gonna go with that. I'm gonna go with the Peruvian Amazon. I really want to do that. [00:18:11] Michael Maldonado: Okay. [00:18:12] Malorie Mackey: So through Earthwatch, which is the organization I volunteer with, sometimes you can volunteer on a riverboat expedition, but you hate boats in the Peruvian Amazon. But it's a riverboat. I will. I will. I will add the addendum. When it's a river, it's usually fine. And it looks like Jungle Cruise. [00:18:31] Michael Maldonado: It's like you just want to live out Jungle Cruise. [00:18:33] Malorie Mackey: I do. It's like a 1920s steamboat. Like, re fixed up so there's, like, bathrooms. You have your own bathroom and a little, you know, area. [00:18:40] Michael Maldonado: Hopefully it's not accident. [00:18:43] Malorie Mackey: But it looks like one. And you get to work with bats and pink river dolphins, and that just sounds great. And you stop in a lot of the tribal areas along the way. So that would be, for me, definitely the Peruvian Amazon. [00:18:58] Michael Maldonado: That's a good one. [00:19:00] Malorie Mackey: And I want to say that I went to the Amazon without, like, really going into, like, the Brazilian Amazon. I'm happy keeping it, like, you know, in the outskirts in Peru. [00:19:09] Michael Maldonado: Yeah. [00:19:10] Malorie Mackey: Yeah. [00:19:10] Michael Maldonado: Okay. It's a good one. I do the Amazon. [00:19:12] Malorie Mackey: Yeah. [00:19:13] Michael Maldonado: Amazon would be fun. [00:19:14] Malorie Mackey: And you get to say, I've been to the Amazon. [00:19:17] Michael Maldonado: Yeah, that's what. That's what it's really all about, right? Getting to say you were there. [00:19:21] Malorie Mackey: No, it's really about getting to live out my Jungle Cruise fantasies. [00:19:25] Michael Maldonado: You just want that. Is the rock gonna come with you? Yeah. [00:19:29] Malorie Mackey: You know, he's not my cup of tea, though. I like him because he's goofy, but not because I think he's attractive. I have respect for him because he took probably. I'm just gonna say it. The most boring, like, uninteresting ride at Disney. The most outdated. One of the most outdated rides at Disney and turned it into a great movie. I was not expecting it to be any good, which is probably why I was so happy with it. And it also. It really feels like the Mummy meets Pirates of the Caribbean. [00:20:04] Michael Maldonado: I'm just gonna say, at the risk of getting you on another full Mallory rant, Jungle Cruise felt very much like the Mummy to me. [00:20:13] Malorie Mackey: Yeah. [00:20:13] Michael Maldonado: Because it's one of those where you go in with no expectation that this is going to be anything but throw away, you know, a throwaway experience, then it's pretty good. [00:20:24] Malorie Mackey: Yeah, it's pretty good. [00:20:27] Michael Maldonado: It's not gonna win an Oscar, but it's way better than it should be. [00:20:30] Malorie Mackey: Yeah. And I like the, like, brother sister dynamic. Like, I like the Evie Jonathan dynamic in the Mummy. And they do a good job in the Jungle Cruise with, like, her and her brother. And I also, like. It wasn't a good nod, but the nod to the Explorers Club because they don't let women in because it's the 30s. Right. [00:20:46] Michael Maldonado: See, I didn't catch that nod because it was pre. My interaction with the Explorers Club. [00:20:52] Malorie Mackey: She's trying to basically join the Explorers Club. And they're like, you're a woman. And she has silly women. They keep rejecting her for being a woman. And then so she has her brother go in and try to read her thing. And they're like, we just know this is all just a sham. Like. Yeah, yeah, it's very good. [00:21:10] Michael Maldonado: So your pick is the Jungle Cruise. [00:21:13] Malorie Mackey: Jungle Cruise, yeah. And Poop on the Stick. [00:21:17] Michael Maldonado: Man. What pics. [00:21:19] Malorie Mackey: I know. [00:21:20] Michael Maldonado: Mine is Wilderness Adventure and the Coolest History ever. And yours is. I want to see poop Sticks and live out this movie. This fake movie experience. [00:21:35] Malorie Mackey: Yes. [00:21:36] Michael Maldonado: With the rock. [00:21:38] Malorie Mackey: I just respect. He produced that movie. He, like, turned that into something good. And I have lots of respect for that. [00:21:45] Michael Maldonado: But you're not into the big jackda guys. [00:21:47] Malorie Mackey: No, I'm really not. [00:21:48] Michael Maldonado: Yeah. Well. [00:21:49] Malorie Mackey: Yeah. [00:21:50] Michael Maldonado: Why are you with me? Wow. [00:21:54] Malorie Mackey: Wow. I mean, my other idea, which I can't do now. Cause it's also too tribal, would be Indonesia for the Maneine Festival. But that's just. I feel like something's gonna happen. [00:22:06] Michael Maldonado: Well, it's on your. [00:22:06] Malorie Mackey: Yeah, we're gonna do it for Weird World, so I feel like I don't want to. [00:22:09] Michael Maldonado: You already have contacts to get that episode. [00:22:11] Malorie Mackey: If we sacrifice. If we pay for the goat to be sacrificed. This sounds awful. I'm an animal lover. This is just. That's just how the world works in some areas, Right? If you buy them the goat, then you get to be a part of the ceremony. [00:22:26] Michael Maldonado: Can't we just. I mean, money's fungible, right? Can't we just be like, we'll buy you this table and then you can spend money that you are going to spend on a different thing on the goat. [00:22:38] Malorie Mackey: That's what I'm gonna tell myself as that happens. [00:22:41] Michael Maldonado: So you're gonna lie to yourself. [00:22:42] Malorie Mackey: Right? [00:22:42] Michael Maldonado: I'll make sure to point out that you're lying to yourself. [00:22:45] Malorie Mackey: No, it's it's hard. It's a hard line sometimes to be a good anthropologist and respect other cultures. Like, I really don't like people having. [00:22:57] Michael Maldonado: A whole talk on. [00:22:58] Malorie Mackey: But I did. I did. Yes, I did give a whole talk on this. It's a great podcast episode. [00:23:03] Michael Maldonado: Check out Mallory's adventures that you didn't talk about in the beginning. [00:23:09] Malorie Mackey: I didn't. Well, I didn't. [00:23:11] Michael Maldonado: Okay, well, it's on there, right? [00:23:12] Malorie Mackey: Yeah. [00:23:13] Michael Maldonado: Okay. It's a good talk. [00:23:14] Malorie Mackey: It is a good talk. It'll be pretty great. And. Yeah. So, I mean, it's one of those things where I'm like, you know, I just have to respect the process. And this is a really old, fascinating tradition that I want to be part of this ritual, so I'm just gonna go along for the ride. [00:23:36] Michael Maldonado: The goat murder or the festival? [00:23:37] Malorie Mackey: The festival. [00:23:38] Michael Maldonado: Okay. [00:23:39] Malorie Mackey: The goat part just kind of happens. It's very, like, old school. Early Destination Truth, when they would go to all these weird tribal places and be forced to, like, eat certain things that the chief gave them because they were there, and then everyone would get sick. [00:23:53] Michael Maldonado: Yeah. [00:23:54] Malorie Mackey: Yeah. [00:23:56] Michael Maldonado: All right. But you're not picking that. [00:23:57] Malorie Mackey: No, I'm not picking that. [00:23:58] Michael Maldonado: You picked Jungle Cruise. [00:24:00] Malorie Mackey: Jungle Cruise and Poop on a Stick. [00:24:02] Michael Maldonado: Got it. [00:24:03] Malorie Mackey: And you got the Outback and Rome. [00:24:06] Michael Maldonado: Yes. Like I said, I would also see Florence and Venice and all the other places. [00:24:12] Malorie Mackey: I almost meant to Milan one time. [00:24:16] Michael Maldonado: What happened? [00:24:17] Malorie Mackey: There was a train strike. I was in Cannes, and Milan is actually pretty close to Cannes. It's like the south of France. Really hits the side of Italy there. And I was going to go on our day off, and it was already questionable because I'm like, man, I have a single day off and it's been torture. Do I really, like, go at five in the morning to Italy to come back at, like, three in the morning the next day? Right. So I was like, debatable if I was going to go through with it. And then there was a train strike. So I was like, well, I guess I'm not going. [00:24:47] Michael Maldonado: Decision was made for you. [00:24:50] Malorie Mackey: Yep. [00:24:51] Michael Maldonado: Okay. [00:24:51] Malorie Mackey: Yeah. What's yours? [00:24:52] Michael Maldonado: Well, I told you, the next one. [00:24:54] Malorie Mackey: I know. Antarctica. [00:24:55] Michael Maldonado: I blew the lead. [00:24:56] Malorie Mackey: Yeah. [00:24:56] Michael Maldonado: Antarctica. [00:24:57] Malorie Mackey: That's. I mean, that's a really solid choice. [00:25:00] Michael Maldonado: I mean, just so few people get to step foot on Antarctica. That's been on my list for a long time, since I was a young kid. It's so hard to get to. It's so remote. [00:25:09] Malorie Mackey: Yeah, I think Arthur did one of those. [00:25:12] Michael Maldonado: Really? [00:25:12] Malorie Mackey: Yeah. [00:25:12] Michael Maldonado: You're just in such a Small subset of people who have seen it. There's very little like it. [00:25:19] Malorie Mackey: Yeah. On Earth, there's a lot of penguins. [00:25:22] Michael Maldonado: See, that's the selling point for you. Penguins aren't a selling point. I mean, not that I dislike them, but they're just not. Yeah, there's. Okay, there's penguins. [00:25:29] Malorie Mackey: Those are the big penguins. [00:25:31] Michael Maldonado: I always thought in my like, you know, fantasy work environment, like, man, what if I, you know, got my degree and then went on an Antarctic expedition and was just like the doctor for the expedition with the expectation of kind of not having to do that much. Right. Like, hopefully we're all kind of healthy and nothing bad's gonna happen and I'll just chill out here. [00:25:54] Malorie Mackey: Well, you join the right club. [00:25:55] Michael Maldonado: You guys do like, do some stuff out here and I'll just chill here. Unless there's an emergency. And hopefully there's not gonna be an emergency. And then I'm just gonna bring my PlayStation and be, you know, not a guilt free time to play my games. I'm sure this is nothing like what it's like actually going on this. But in my head, this is the expedition. Nothing goes wrong. I don't have to do any emergency procedures in Antarctica. Everyone's just healthy and fine, doing their thing, and I'm just there playing video games guilt free. Because what else am I gonna do? I'm in Antarctica, you know, I can't. Can't do a whole lot else. Don't have to make up excuses to not go to social events. [00:26:34] Malorie Mackey: Although you will have to deal with the polar nights and midnight suns. [00:26:37] Michael Maldonado: But you're gonna be like underground. Yeah. Like in ground, like indoors. You're not just camping outside? [00:26:45] Malorie Mackey: Well, no, but I mean, you're gonna step out at some point. [00:26:47] Michael Maldonado: Oh, I wan. [00:26:49] Malorie Mackey: Yeah, but I, you know, and you're gonna have to do all your doctor work on the boat heading into Antarctica when everyone's sick. [00:26:56] Michael Maldonado: That's fine. [00:26:57] Malorie Mackey: You don't get really that motion sick? [00:26:59] Michael Maldonado: I don't really get that motion sick. I mean, if it's very bad, sure. But you just bring a bunch of like scopolamine, the patches and stuff. [00:27:06] Malorie Mackey: That's true. [00:27:07] Michael Maldonado: There's like legit anti nausea drugs that. Not over the counter stuff. [00:27:12] Malorie Mackey: Yeah, I legitimately think I would be down and out the entire boat ride. [00:27:17] Michael Maldonado: Well, I hear it's a pretty long boat ride. [00:27:19] Malorie Mackey: That's why I'm afraid to do it because I really hate being. [00:27:24] Michael Maldonado: Well, you're gonna be shit out of luck because I'm not going alone. [00:27:26] Malorie Mackey: Oh, I know. Oh, I do it with the addendum of I might be incapacitated for a month. [00:27:32] Michael Maldonado: Well, I'm also not gonna be the expedition doctor on this, so good luck. I'm just gonna have to find someone else. Yeah, I'm just going for funsies. [00:27:41] Malorie Mackey: Yeah. Yeah. See, I want to say Greece now because I really, really, really have always wanted to go to Greece, but I'm torn between Greece and Japan. And Japan is really because. Studio Ghibli Museum. I'm gonna go with Japan because I have to go to the Studio Ghibli Museum and park. [00:28:03] Michael Maldonado: Yeah. [00:28:04] Malorie Mackey: I mean, the giant Totoro ticket master like that. Just. Just everything that's right with the world. [00:28:10] Michael Maldonado: I just like the idea that the reason you want to go to this famous island nation with a magnificently robust history and samurai culture and all these things is for the modern Studio Ghibli amusement park. [00:28:27] Malorie Mackey: With Totoro. [00:28:28] Michael Maldonado: With Totoro. [00:28:29] Malorie Mackey: Totoro is a selling point always. [00:28:31] Michael Maldonado: So you want to go to Japan to see Totoro? [00:28:33] Malorie Mackey: Yes. Okay. [00:28:34] Michael Maldonado: You know, he's not real. There's not actually. [00:28:38] Malorie Mackey: A child. We're not breaking my spirit today. [00:28:40] Michael Maldonado: There's not a car bus. There's not a car bus. [00:28:42] Malorie Mackey: Cat bus. [00:28:43] Michael Maldonado: Car bus. There's not a cat bus. [00:28:44] Malorie Mackey: There's not a cat bus. I don't believe in this at all. [00:28:48] Michael Maldonado: It's not gonna be an actual cat. [00:28:49] Malorie Mackey: Well, there is a cat bus. You can get inside. [00:28:52] Michael Maldonado: It's fake. [00:28:52] Malorie Mackey: Well, that's. [00:28:53] Michael Maldonado: It's just a bus painted like a cat. [00:28:55] Malorie Mackey: Don't ruin my fantasy here. [00:28:56] Michael Maldonado: It's not gonna be an actual cat. You're not gonna get up inside a cat. [00:29:01] Malorie Mackey: It's a little weird. It's a little weird. Think about it. I also want to go to that. I'm forgetting what it's called now, but the town with all the dolls. [00:29:12] Michael Maldonado: Oh, yeah, I know. I don't remember. [00:29:15] Malorie Mackey: It's like a very small village, and there was an artist that lived there that left. Like, loved her childhood there and left, and then she came back, and a lot of the people that she knew there had either, like, passed away or people were just moving out of the village because it's so small. There's nothing going on. So for every person that lived in the village that she remembered, she created a doll for them. [00:29:37] Michael Maldonado: That's cool. [00:29:37] Malorie Mackey: So now everybody in that village has a doll. [00:29:41] Michael Maldonado: It's like a stuff mostly in an abandoned village. [00:29:44] Malorie Mackey: Mostly. [00:29:44] Michael Maldonado: Okay. [00:29:45] Malorie Mackey: It's now kind of a tourist attraction because it's really cool. But there's not much going on there, so it's mostly. Some people live there. Just a few people live there. [00:29:54] Michael Maldonado: The artist is just like, I'm just waiting for you to die. To replace you with a doll. [00:29:58] Malorie Mackey: Yeah, pretty much. Or to move out. You can also move out. That's fine. She replaces you with a doll. [00:30:02] Michael Maldonado: Okay. [00:30:03] Malorie Mackey: So, I mean, that's just really cool. [00:30:06] Michael Maldonado: Well, they have also at least one village, if not a few, that are set up to look like they would have during, like, the height of samurai culture. [00:30:16] Malorie Mackey: Oh, yeah. Definitely got to do that. [00:30:18] Michael Maldonado: Yeah. [00:30:19] Malorie Mackey: Also Kyoto. Kyoto looks beautiful. [00:30:23] Michael Maldonado: You know, ironically, I've never been to mainland Japan because we lived in Okinawa. [00:30:28] Malorie Mackey: Yeah. [00:30:29] Michael Maldonado: And I'm sure I went to. I'm sure we, like, stopped at the airport, but I never left the airport to see mainland Japan because we were. My parents had already lived in Japan before I was born, so they didn't have a huge need to see more of mainland Japan at the time. And Okinawa is very much similar now. A similar culture. They used to be distinct cultures until Japan took it over. But they have a lot in common. And we just instead went, when we left Okinawa, would go to Korea or Guam or Singapore or Thailand. Different places. [00:31:04] Malorie Mackey: You've been all over Asia. [00:31:05] Michael Maldonado: I know. I've been all over Asia. Japan, though, is a good choice and probably would have been on my three list if I hadn't already lived there. [00:31:13] Malorie Mackey: Yeah. [00:31:14] Michael Maldonado: But it's on our episode list. [00:31:15] Malorie Mackey: It is. [00:31:16] Michael Maldonado: I want to go there in search of the legendary Hanso Masamune while I. [00:31:21] Malorie Mackey: Hang out with Totoro. [00:31:24] Michael Maldonado: So we're both kind of going there to live out childhood fantasies, right? [00:31:27] Malorie Mackey: Yeah. [00:31:27] Michael Maldonado: The Masamune is just always a legendary video game sword item. Yeah, it's always, like, one of the end game items. The Mass Immune, which apparently was an actual sword, doesn't have any special powers, obviously, but there was a guy who. I think he was named Hanjo Massimune. [00:31:45] Malorie Mackey: Yeah. [00:31:45] Michael Maldonado: One of the great blacksmiths from the samurai era. And I believe there are ledgers showing the sword being, like, sold. [00:31:54] Malorie Mackey: That's really cool. [00:31:55] Michael Maldonado: You know, across cultures and then just lost. [00:31:58] Malorie Mackey: Yeah. [00:31:58] Michael Maldonado: To time. So, yeah. [00:32:00] Malorie Mackey: Really cool. [00:32:01] Michael Maldonado: I want to do that. You want to go to Studio Ghibli Park. So we want to go to Japan to live out childhood fantasies. [00:32:07] Malorie Mackey: Yeah, definitely it is. Because, you know, I've only been to Asia for a grand total of, I think, three weeks, and 99% of that was in Cambodia. And I had a layover in Shanghai where I went to Disneyland. [00:32:23] Michael Maldonado: It's funny that you went to Shanghai, Disneyland during a layover. [00:32:27] Malorie Mackey: I legitimately, you know, I think I had. I think I was just SOL and my layover was going to be 16 hours and it was like, well, I'm not gonna be in the airport for 16 hours and you can actually get a 24 hour visa. There's like a very set stipulation of rules that you have to follow to be released into Shanghai on a 24 hour visa. And you don't have to, like, plan, you just have to know what to do. So I had to have like my checklist on. Okay, this is what I need to do. And you have to go in the right line and go through and I got my 24 hour visa. [00:32:58] Michael Maldonado: You should write a little article about how to do that. [00:33:00] Malorie Mackey: That's a good idea. Yeah, definitely. That's a good call. [00:33:02] Michael Maldonado: I'm sure I wouldn't have. I wouldn't have known that. [00:33:04] Malorie Mackey: Yeah, it was. I did a lot of research because I was like, well, I'm doing this and then, you know, you just get a car and drive to Disney. I was at Disney for which side. [00:33:15] Michael Maldonado: Of the road do they drive on? [00:33:17] Malorie Mackey: Our side, I think. [00:33:18] Michael Maldonado: Is it. I'm pretty sure Japan's opposite. [00:33:20] Malorie Mackey: I think it's just Japan over there. I'm pretty sure. I mean, I wasn't exactly paying attention, but I think I would have noted if we were on the opposite side of the road. [00:33:31] Michael Maldonado: Yeah. I don't know. [00:33:32] Malorie Mackey: Yeah. And that was an experience. [00:33:36] Michael Maldonado: Yeah. [00:33:36] Malorie Mackey: Yeah, I bet we've probably talked about this in the podcast recently. Yeah, recently. But the Pirates of the Caribbean ride is the greatest ride in Shanghai Disney. In any Disney park at all. That pirates ride, it goes backwards. [00:33:52] Michael Maldonado: So you just want to go places where there's rides? [00:33:55] Malorie Mackey: No, I'm not really that big of a ride person. For sure. [00:33:58] Michael Maldonado: You want to live out Jungle Cruise. [00:34:01] Malorie Mackey: Okay, that's fair. [00:34:01] Michael Maldonado: I love Disney based on a ride. [00:34:03] Malorie Mackey: Okay. [00:34:04] Michael Maldonado: You want to go to Studio Ghibli Amusement park, where I'm sure there's rides. Yeah. There's a Totoro ride. [00:34:09] Malorie Mackey: Okay. The poop on a stick, though, is just not right. [00:34:12] Michael Maldonado: That's just good old fun. [00:34:13] Malorie Mackey: Yeah. Old fashioned fun, Right. I would love to ride horses again. [00:34:18] Michael Maldonado: Well, you can just do that anywhere, right? [00:34:21] Malorie Mackey: Yes. Shenandoah. [00:34:23] Michael Maldonado: Yeah, they're all over the place. [00:34:24] Malorie Mackey: We gotta do that. I miss my horses. [00:34:25] Michael Maldonado: We're in horse country. [00:34:28] Malorie Mackey: Yeah. Yeah. [00:34:30] Michael Maldonado: See, I am so uncomfortable on horse. I, you know, I've been. [00:34:34] Malorie Mackey: You have control issues. [00:34:35] Michael Maldonado: Yeah, I. I've Ridden horses. But I have no experience being like trained to ride horses. Growing up, that was not something I. I know you did. So the times I've gone, I just get there and ask. I need your oldest, slowest horse. I'm looking for something that is akin to a recliner, that moves for me, that walks for me, that just knows where it's going. Because I'm gonna have. When I get on this thing, I'm gonna have no idea how to maneuver this animal. [00:35:05] Malorie Mackey: I just don't like that they have personalities. [00:35:06] Michael Maldonado: I don't. Yeah, no. [00:35:08] Malorie Mackey: The horse I used to ride as a kid, her name was Lucy. [00:35:10] Michael Maldonado: They're very. They feel unsteady from where I'm sitting. I know they're steady, but they have four legs. I know, but from where I'm. One side goes up and the other side goes up and there's. You're shockingly high when you're up there. It feels so high. [00:35:25] Malorie Mackey: Yeah. [00:35:26] Michael Maldonado: Up. And it's just this jittery dinosaur animal that. You're right. I just. [00:35:32] Malorie Mackey: Dinosaur animal. [00:35:34] Michael Maldonado: Not my. I don't think. I don't need that thing going faster than a snail's pace. [00:35:40] Malorie Mackey: The horse that I was trained to ride on, Lucy, was just so stubborn. And you did like, part of the training is like, you gotta get it to listen to you. And sometimes they don't want to. [00:35:51] Michael Maldonado: My first one as an adult, I never read one as a kid was Thunder, which was ironically named because that's. [00:35:59] Malorie Mackey: Autumn's favorite name now. [00:36:01] Michael Maldonado: Yeah, that's true. That's funny because that thing moved. I mean, as slow as. [00:36:10] Malorie Mackey: So you're the jerk holding up all the other horses behind. [00:36:12] Michael Maldonado: I was in the back. I stayed in the back. [00:36:14] Malorie Mackey: Did they leave you behind? [00:36:16] Michael Maldonado: Maybe it wasn't all the way in the back, but no, I did nothing. It was. They were. It was a slow moving tour through Shenandoah. I went through like the. And I guess I was back, middle to back of the pack, but I was like, I don't know how to do any. Like, I will have no control over this animal once I'm on this thing. [00:36:34] Malorie Mackey: So do what's pretty easy just to steer. Okay. [00:36:38] Michael Maldonado: I didn't even want that. I didn't even want that responsibility. They're like, you just like, you know, they're. You know, you just edge in with your foot a little bit here and you pull there. I'm like, nope, nope. It needs to know where it's going. I'm not going to have any ability to deal with this on a Tour. I was also. I felt under pressure because, you know, there's, like, 10 other people. I'm not going to be responsible for ruining everyone else's time. I'm fine with my time being wasted by myself and my own incompetence, but I don't like wasting other people's time. [00:37:03] Malorie Mackey: Well, they do also. When you do something like that, they have a planned order of which horse is where for various reasons. [00:37:12] Michael Maldonado: Oh, yeah. Thunder. [00:37:14] Malorie Mackey: Yeah. [00:37:14] Michael Maldonado: Knew where he was going and slowly followed the horse in front of him. And I did nothing. I literally did nothing. [00:37:21] Malorie Mackey: They'll put, like, the slow horses in the middle to keep the horses from. Get, like, some of them going, too. If they know a horse is going to go too fast, they'll put a slow horse in front of it so it can't really go around. [00:37:31] Michael Maldonado: So I was a blocker. [00:37:32] Malorie Mackey: You were a blocker. [00:37:33] Michael Maldonado: Thunder was the blocker. I'm just here for the ride. [00:37:37] Malorie Mackey: It is. I'll say I rode. I rode a horse in Kaukoslauten in Finland, in the Arctic. And it was a little like, I'm not afraid of horses. I've always ridden horses, and I love it. But, like, they would flip a few times because you're on the ice, and you would feel it and be like, I don't even know. That horse just fell down in the snow. [00:37:59] Michael Maldonado: Yeah. No, thank you. [00:38:02] Malorie Mackey: Yeah. Well, one more thing about horses, I have to. I have to tell the story. When I was learning to gallop, so. So you. You start just walking, which is what you're gonna do on those tours. [00:38:11] Michael Maldonado: Oh, yeah. [00:38:11] Malorie Mackey: Then you start to try. [00:38:12] Michael Maldonado: I'm good with. I'm good. Beginning and ending at walking. [00:38:15] Malorie Mackey: Trotting is where the horse is kind of, like, going kind of slow. It's like the pretty. [00:38:19] Michael Maldonado: Probably. I've probably done that. [00:38:20] Malorie Mackey: And you have to kind of go up and down with the horse. Like, you have a motion. You do, so it's not like hurting you while you're on the horse. So there's trotting, and then. So you kind of go through that, and then cantering is like the in between. Between, like, the trot and the run. It's like when they're developing a little bit of speed, and then you gallop is the full stride. Full stride. And they. They had us gallop in this. It was like a pin, but it was a huge space, and there were trees, and that was probably one of the few times I feel like I just lost control of this animal. And my life is in this horse's hands because it's diving in and out of trees really fast. Just went, yeah. And I mean, what do you do? Right? So I just. And you kind of like assume the position. Position and lean forward and hold on. And I'm like, okay, well, if this horse hits a tree, I'm dead. So. [00:39:07] Michael Maldonado: See, I don't need. I don't need that in my life at all. I don't even like giving up control to other human beings. I don't need it given up to this monster animal. [00:39:18] Malorie Mackey: It was a little intimidating, just like weaving in and out of the trees. That was one of the few times I'm like, oh, oh my God, what have I gotten myself into? [00:39:24] Michael Maldonado: Yeah, no thanks. [00:39:25] Malorie Mackey: Yeah, but there was a while, you know, I wanted to have a horse farm. [00:39:30] Michael Maldonado: Yeah. [00:39:30] Malorie Mackey: I loved horses. [00:39:31] Michael Maldonado: It seems like a lot of work. [00:39:33] Malorie Mackey: Yeah, I know. You'd have to have like workers to work in the horses. [00:39:37] Michael Maldonado: You'd have to be an actual farm. [00:39:39] Malorie Mackey: Yes. [00:39:39] Michael Maldonado: Right. Or you'd have to be. You'd have to be doing something with the horses, like running a. Learn to ride horses. [00:39:47] Malorie Mackey: I mean, that's the easiest thing I would think to do is like, you have a stables, you have stable hands and you're teaching people or having someone there teach people how to ride horses. But you also kind of get some free labor in that because kind of like the deal with taking care of horses is learning how to take care of horses. So if you're going to learn how to ride, you have to be responsible for getting the horse ready and then cleaning it off afterwards and brushing it and doing the whole thing. Brushing. [00:40:13] Michael Maldonado: I like that. [00:40:13] Malorie Mackey: Yeah, it's fun. So it's kind of part of the experience. So you kind of like the people that are coming to ride kind of do that for you. [00:40:20] Michael Maldonado: Yeah, I like it. It's a good scam. [00:40:22] Malorie Mackey: Yeah, it is. Although not so much in the places where you just kind of pay to like go in a circle. [00:40:28] Michael Maldonado: Yeah. [00:40:30] Malorie Mackey: Like your Shenandoah experience. [00:40:32] Michael Maldonado: Yeah, that was my kind of horse riding. Just a bride, just a semi alive ride. [00:40:37] Malorie Mackey: I used to have my own helmet and everything and crop the riding crop. I know. Fancy. I was an English style rider. [00:40:46] Michael Maldonado: Oh. [00:40:49] Malorie Mackey: Do you know what the difference is? I want to hear your guesstimate about the differences. [00:40:57] Michael Maldonado: All right. I feel like I at one point in my life did know the difference between this. What's the other style? [00:41:02] Malorie Mackey: Western. [00:41:02] Michael Maldonado: Western. Okay. Does it have to do with the. [00:41:06] Malorie Mackey: Saddle part of it? [00:41:07] Michael Maldonado: Okay. [00:41:08] Malorie Mackey: Yeah. [00:41:09] Michael Maldonado: Well, first of all, we're not talking about like side Saddle. Woman riding style. What is that called? [00:41:15] Malorie Mackey: Side saddle. [00:41:16] Michael Maldonado: Is that side saddle? Okay, that seems like that was back. [00:41:19] Malorie Mackey: When women just didn't have rights and wore dresses and couldn't straddle a horse because they. [00:41:23] Michael Maldonado: Oh, that's why. That's why. Oh, wow. That's really funny. [00:41:26] Malorie Mackey: Yeah. [00:41:26] Michael Maldonado: It seems like a terrible way to ride a horse. [00:41:29] Malorie Mackey: Right. It doesn't seem sturdy. You would hold on to a man. That's what you would do. Someone else would shadow the horse, and you hold on to them. I know. [00:41:36] Michael Maldonado: Okay. [00:41:37] Malorie Mackey: Yeah. [00:41:38] Michael Maldonado: Okay. All right. So it has. Oh, man. I know. It has something to do with the. [00:41:44] Malorie Mackey: Saddle is a part of it. [00:41:45] Michael Maldonado: Saddle. And what's the novel saddle called? [00:41:48] Malorie Mackey: Oh, yeah, yeah. [00:41:49] Michael Maldonado: The horn, the horn, and the reins. [00:41:50] Malorie Mackey: Yeah. [00:41:51] Michael Maldonado: I don't know what the difference is. [00:41:52] Malorie Mackey: The Western has the little saddle horn. [00:41:54] Michael Maldonado: Okay. [00:41:55] Malorie Mackey: And the English doesn't. [00:41:56] Michael Maldonado: Okay. [00:41:56] Malorie Mackey: And because so in Western, it's way less. It's like there's no rules. The English are all about rules. There's so many. There's rules for everything. Western is kind of like a free for all. There's way less rules. And you use one hand to hold onto the horn, and then you keep the reins in a single hand and kind of maneuver the horse with one hand. [00:42:14] Michael Maldonado: Okay. [00:42:15] Malorie Mackey: With the English, you kind of like hold both the reins and there's. There is no horn. [00:42:20] Michael Maldonado: I think I've done both ways then. [00:42:22] Malorie Mackey: Yeah. You hold the reins and then you have a riding crop. So you kind of like. You kind of like use it to. It doesn't hurt the horse. I mean, the horses have thick hides. You're just kind of like, not. It's like knocking it to say, hurry up, hurry up. And there's different. Like, the horses learn. There's different, like, taps and maneuvers you do to get them to move into the different positions, like trotting and canter. It's way more structured. [00:42:45] Michael Maldonado: I'm pretty sure I've done both Western and English style then. And I've never used a crop on a horse. [00:42:55] Malorie Mackey: Wow. I feel so called out right now. Wow. But yeah, I could ride horses all day. [00:43:03] Michael Maldonado: Yeah. [00:43:04] Malorie Mackey: Yeah. [00:43:05] Michael Maldonado: 30 minutes to an hour is good for me. [00:43:07] Malorie Mackey: Throw in some horseback riding in Greece and then we're all set here. [00:43:10] Michael Maldonado: I don't know if we need to do that. [00:43:11] Malorie Mackey: Yeah, we do. [00:43:12] Michael Maldonado: I don't know about that. [00:43:14] Malorie Mackey: Or we could do out west, just full free for all western horse ride. You love westerns. [00:43:19] Michael Maldonado: I know. [00:43:20] Malorie Mackey: Okay. [00:43:22] Michael Maldonado: I'm open to it. I just don't love. I've done it A few times. And it's not like I got up there and immediately regretted it, but the whole time just like, I'm not gonna have any control over this thing. [00:43:35] Malorie Mackey: Yeah, you get. [00:43:36] Michael Maldonado: I guess if I knew what I was doing, I would feel better about it. [00:43:39] Malorie Mackey: I mean, it's really just like steering a horse with the reins. [00:43:44] Michael Maldonado: For those of you listening, she's doing a rein steering motion. [00:43:49] Malorie Mackey: I mean, it just looks like driving all day. [00:43:51] Michael Maldonado: That told me nothing because they have. [00:43:53] Malorie Mackey: Like a little bar in their mouth and you're just pulling on the reins, which pulls the bar. [00:44:00] Michael Maldonado: And you know what they do in that bar when they're doing the, like, gnaw thing? What's that called? [00:44:04] Malorie Mackey: I don't know. [00:44:04] Michael Maldonado: What's the saying? [00:44:05] Malorie Mackey: What is it the horse saying? What's the saying? I don't know. [00:44:08] Michael Maldonado: We just talked about it. [00:44:09] Malorie Mackey: Oh, chomping at the bit. [00:44:10] Michael Maldonado: But it's champing. [00:44:12] Malorie Mackey: It's champing. [00:44:12] Michael Maldonado: It actually is champing. Yes. [00:44:14] Malorie Mackey: Was that on Larry David? [00:44:16] Michael Maldonado: It was recently on there. [00:44:17] Malorie Mackey: It was in Caribbean. [00:44:18] Michael Maldonado: But it's a common. I mean, it's a common one, but it is actually champing. [00:44:21] Malorie Mackey: Champing at the bit. [00:44:23] Michael Maldonado: And the champing is specifically the, like, gnawing they do at the back. [00:44:26] Malorie Mackey: Okay. [00:44:29] Michael Maldonado: How about that knowledge drop for the non horse rider? [00:44:32] Malorie Mackey: Yeah, I didn't know that one. Well, yeah, I guess that was fun. We kind of did our whole little tour around the world there. Of all the places to go. So you have Antarctica, the outback, and Rome. Rome, right. The Roman Empire. [00:44:48] Michael Maldonado: Of course. I think about it. I'm not even joking. I know. It was a meme. You know how often I would say I think about Rome? At least for a few, you know, 32nd period. [00:45:01] Malorie Mackey: Yeah. [00:45:02] Michael Maldonado: Every other. To every third day. [00:45:05] Malorie Mackey: That's crazy. I don't. [00:45:07] Michael Maldonado: It's relevant. [00:45:08] Malorie Mackey: Just. [00:45:08] Michael Maldonado: It's always relevant to something. [00:45:10] Malorie Mackey: Is it? [00:45:11] Michael Maldonado: Yeah. In the same way, more modernly, Seinfeld is relevant to things. Seinfeld, I would say I reference almost every day or think about every day. [00:45:19] Malorie Mackey: It stresses me out so much. [00:45:21] Michael Maldonado: It's just relevant. Always Ancient Rome, always relevant. [00:45:24] Malorie Mackey: Okay. All right. Come on. [00:45:26] Michael Maldonado: Who doesn't. What guy doesn't have a fantasy about being like gladiators? I don't know. The gladiators were slaves. I don't want none of that. They're to die. A Roman centurion leading army of legionnaires. [00:45:41] Malorie Mackey: Right. All right. Yeah, Yeah, I can see that. [00:45:44] Michael Maldonado: And I got the giant tower shields and the short swords. [00:45:47] Malorie Mackey: Yeah. [00:45:47] Michael Maldonado: Carried. [00:45:48] Malorie Mackey: Yeah, I like it. [00:45:49] Michael Maldonado: It's very innovative warfare techniques. Obviously they beat everybody for a long time. [00:45:57] Malorie Mackey: Right? Damn it. I forgot my main one that I have been. I see. I knew you just went through three. [00:46:02] Michael Maldonado: And didn't pick your actual one. [00:46:03] Malorie Mackey: I didn't pick my actual one. How? [00:46:04] Michael Maldonado: You don't get a bonus. [00:46:05] Malorie Mackey: I don't get a bonus. You know, I'm so disappointed in myself. This is like. [00:46:09] Michael Maldonado: We all are. [00:46:10] Malorie Mackey: I'm like, there's a place that is number one on my list that I'm just totally blanking on right now. And it's gonna come later. And I could not put it together. And you know. You know what it is, too. You know what it is. And I can't believe I spaced on it. [00:46:21] Michael Maldonado: Don't you put the pressure on me like I'm supposed to. You didn't even know what it was. Apparently. [00:46:25] Malorie Mackey: We even talked about it here just now. Kind of. Kind of roundabout. [00:46:31] Michael Maldonado: I don't know. What is it? [00:46:32] Malorie Mackey: Egypt. [00:46:33] Michael Maldonado: Is that your number one? [00:46:34] Malorie Mackey: Yes. [00:46:34] Michael Maldonado: I know it's on the list. [00:46:35] Malorie Mackey: Oh, it's the top of the list. Is it? Yes. Because it's your whole outback about how the outback is so different. Egypt is just so different to anything I've ever done. [00:46:45] Michael Maldonado: I'd love to see it. It just seems maybe a little dangerous right now. [00:46:48] Malorie Mackey: You have to go the right way. You have to go through a guide. You have to get a credible guide agency and have someone with you the whole time. [00:46:56] Michael Maldonado: Dangerous in a way. Not a wilderness. I don't mind the wilderness. Danger. It's dangerous from other human beings making it dangerous. [00:47:05] Malorie Mackey: You have to know what you're doing. You have to look like you know what you're doing. That's the real thing. You can't look like a tourist. And you have to have someone with you that will, like, stop people from coming up to you. [00:47:14] Michael Maldonado: Gotcha. [00:47:15] Malorie Mackey: But yeah. Damn. Damn. I missed that opportunity. We just talked about the mummy. [00:47:20] Michael Maldonado: We're not doing it. I know. [00:47:22] Malorie Mackey: Number one. I had this whole Egypt trip plan for Egypt, Jerusalem, which is definitely out right now. [00:47:31] Michael Maldonado: Yeah. That episode's taken a back seat for a while. [00:47:36] Malorie Mackey: Petra. [00:47:37] Michael Maldonado: Yeah. I mean, there's a lot of very obviously very famous, historically significant things in that region. [00:47:44] Malorie Mackey: Masada's like, my top. [00:47:45] Michael Maldonado: Yeah. [00:47:45] Malorie Mackey: Yeah. Anyway, I missed that opportunity. I knew I was gonna drop the ball. I'm so bad at picking up. [00:47:51] Michael Maldonado: We did not know your own number one on your bucket list. [00:47:54] Malorie Mackey: I'm just tired. And I was sitting here like, I know that there's just a number one, and I'm like just not thinking of it and then I'm like, maybe it was Romania and I just like have crusted off. Nope, it was Egypt. [00:48:04] Michael Maldonado: Good job. [00:48:05] Malorie Mackey: Okay, on that note, thank you guys so much for tuning in today. Remember to visit MallorySadventures.com for more and check out Weird World Adventures on Amazon Prime. Now season one is streaming and we're about to begin our 10 episode countdown where we recap the 10 episodes you can expect to see in season two, which airs this fall on Amazon Prime. [00:48:28] Michael Maldonado: And the preview reel for season two is live now. [00:48:32] Malorie Mackey: It is live now. Go to Instagram and it's MallorySadventures on Instagram. Or you can just search Weird World Adventures Season 2 promo on Google and it just comes up. So make sure you check it out. I'm very proud of it. And that's all we have for you. So thank you for tuning in, everybody. Thank you for being here with me today. Michael. [00:48:53] Michael Maldonado: Thanks for having me, Mallory. [00:48:55] Malorie Mackey: And until next time, everybody stay weird.